Idiot's Guide to Japanese Squat Toilets

 I used to have a Toto toilet, so I wasn't too surprised when I saw them all over Japan.  What I was surprised at was the spectrum of technology in toilet design.  Some were examples of advanced engineering, and others were just a step up of what I had encountered in Spain, in the 70's in a state park (which was a place for your feet and a hole in the center, I was pretty young back then and decided to just hold it).  The worst toilet was on the trail to the Promenade of Cedars in Nagano, out in the middle of the forest, it was clear that no one was maintaining it.  There was a building, and a ceramic toilet but it was open to the elements and it was pretty grimy but in a pinch, if you had strong quads, you could use it.  Most surprisingly to me, the toilets at the Imperial Palace for the tourists, just outside the gate, fair enough it's more of a state park setting, here I stood in line waiting for the next door to open.  They have two styles of toilets, the western, not a toto toilet, just a run of the mill ceramic toilet, and then this.  There were quiet a few giggles, and nods of acknowledgement when I backed out and went back to the line, because no.  I don't even know what to do here. Now I ask, could this be easier to use if you're wearing a kimono?  I'll have to google.

Pity I didn't watch this before... who am I kidding.  No

(This is a young married couple, he is Japanese and she is American living in Japan. They've made some very cute videos together).

As I was strolling through the Takenaka Carpentry Tools Museum, I walked past a bank of open doors, when I realized the lids of all of the toilets were opening.  This was the best in class of all of the bathrooms I had experienced in Japan.  I'm sure Toto make a higher end, but this was the first toilet, I felt was inviting me to use it.... and yes it does have a water noise feature to drown out your visit, if needed.

And finally when it couldn't get crazier.  My final hotel stay included this sign in the bathroom, which makes me rethink toilet paper.  Just a disclaimer, this was not a Japanese chain, this is owned by a Singaporean corporation.